Fantastic estate-agent shots of Grace’s exquisite townhouse aside, I’m not sure I have quite recovered from the trauma of this week’s episode, and it can only really go downhill from here. Now I’m not one to count my chickens before they’ve hatched, but it looks like the little idea I hatched about more than one murderer might have just occurred to Marcella too so can we all celebrate the one and only prediction I’ve ever got right (please Hans, let me have this one?!) However, it does also seem that Marcella is looking a leetle on the guilty side herself at the mo, so maybe being on the same wavelength is not something to write home about after all. For what it is worth, I have a great working relationship with the pregnant mistress of my ex-husband (sorry, sorry, current husband. THEY WERE ON A BREAK*). Let us proceed.
What’s Gone Down:
1. DTG Construction Squad Thread
- Issues arise with the Lambeth project since the planning permission man is not one to allow the little matter of a death in the family to get in the way of, well, permitting his planning. It’s good to know there are such conscientious workers in the world.
- BBB Sylvie allows Henry to deal with the Lambeth matter in an act of hitherto unprecendented stepmaternal affection.
- Grace’s house becomes a popular tourist site when every Tom, Dick and Marcella turn up on the doorstep, only to miss Jason catching Grace’s stepfather Stephen in her bed. Let’s have a moment to allow the weirdness to sink in. Jason’s shock soon turns to unashamed calculation as he blackmails Stephen to persuade BBB Sylvie to give him his job back at DTG.
- I’m so averse to pain that I can’t even bring myself to get another ear piercing, but when Jason isn’t standing moodily amongst some floaty curtains, he’s paying a group of thugs to beat him up because he wants to “feel something”.
- Jan tried to be better friends with Henry because a) he is an adorable cupcake of a man, and b) they both “care about” Matthew (i.e. Tall Dark Handsome, his boyfriend). Luckily, tact is not a quality that is of the utmost importance in being an adorable cupcake since leading someone you barely know to the place where their sister was horribly murdered doesn’t feature highly on any ‘How to Make Friends’ list I’ve ever consulted.
2. As Yet Unknown Illegal Worker Thread
- Dodgy Bente’s name is actually Dodgy Bendek. Bentek? Oops.
- The woman with whom Bendek dined last week tells her husband Stuart that she doesn’t like having him around the house. And fair enough when he’s watching their hanky panky through the kitchen window.
- Plus, Bendek is able to fend off an extremely angry attacker COMPLETE WITH IRON CROWBAR without even breaking a sweat. Who else is nervous?
- Speaking of Stuart, we know two things about him: 1) he has some kind of illness with which he doesn’t want to worry his wife, and 2) he has a gun and a secret file on someone called Andrew Barnes. Watch out for yourself, Andrew!
3. Catching the Killer Thread
- A sweet old man thanks his lucky stars that he’s a dog person after the murderer (one of?) is scared off by his large Alsatian. Nice to know that gravity bends to the forces of great screenwriting when the killer drops a keycard in slow motion as he makes his slightly hurried getaway.
- Peter Cullen attempts to kill Maddie, having already (presumably) murdered her boyfriend Adrian. For what it’s worth, lying beside the Thames with a stab wound in your throat is quite a good excuse not to pick up the phone, even if it is a call from your irate girlfriend. Aaand he tries to kill Marcella too, but THANK GOODNESS Grumpy Rav saves the day and arrives bang on time. I’m willing to bet that the first words Marcella uttered after Rav tore the plastic bag off her face were “I told you so, you grumpy sod”.
- Marcella interviews the man from Canalside Cabs who she’d seen on the CCTV outside Grace Gibson’s house at the time of her supposed abduction; what she doesn’t know is that Hussein Al Sayed’s friend saw a woman “dragging something heavy” from the house and into a car. EEK.
- Just as the icing on the cake to make herself look even guiltier
WHEN, GODDAMMIT, WHEN!!!!if the truth about her nocturnal visit gets out, Marcella substitutes the DNA of a homeless lady on the street for her own when a woman’s blood is found in Grace’s house.
- BBB Sylvie at basically all times, particularly when:
- she wipes away her tears in front of the mirror because she isn’t used to being vulnerable.
- she ignores her younger husband’s pathetic comment that her outfit “doesn’t do her any favours” and wears it anyway. BOW DOWN TO THE FABULOUS, BOY.
- she cuts Jason down to size with a “You don’t get things in life, Jason. You earn them.” Might we learn more about her past at some point?
- The shiver down my spine when Maddie revealed that the present Peter has given her was a bottle of the scent that Adrian used to buy for her. AHHH.
- The fact that the killer left what looked like his entire supply of blue tape and plastic bags at the house of the sweet old man, just in case there was any doubt at all of his murderous intentions.
- Stephen is a wrong ‘un, no doubt about it. Might a possible obsession with his stepdaughter be the secret behind Grace’s disappearance?
- Henry will sleep with Tall Dark Handsome, no question. And I’m about as jealous as Ginger Beardie will be when he finds out. <–I WILL NOT LET THIS GO.
- Bendek will discover something incriminating about Stuart, and use it to blackmail him into letting him sleep with his wife. Or something.
- Peter Cullen will come up with some plausible theory about how he committed all of the murders just out of spite, leaving Marcella’s theory that there is more than one killer out in the cold.
- Sweet dreams to Andrew Barnes, whoever he may be. If your name gets brought up at any point past the fourth episode, you’re only potential corpse material.
Tills nästa vecka!
* Quotation courtesy of another much-loved television series that is on a slightly different playing field to Marcella. ‘The One Where Ross Kills Rachel With A Plastic Bag’ doesn’t have quite the same ring to it somehow.